Time seems to travel on a speed jet! It seemed like just yesterday when I just went to INTI and was so blur. And, with a snap of a finger, Voila, it’s 2005! Aihzz..this feeling of nostalgia is probably caused by re-visiting college earlier today to collect money for the sale of some textbooks. Well, many apologies for the “dead” blog.

So, what have I been up to? Well, there has been a lot of rushing here and there to get my VISA application done for NZ. I hated the Medical Examination man. And, gosh, doubt if anyone would want to hear about it. Im about done with the application forms and will probably send them to Singapore by next week. Imagaine! They don’t even have a NZ High Com here! Heloo??! Malaysia is developed enough for you to set up a High Com here ya know?! But oh well, it has it’s plus effects. Hmm..lemme see, like, I can go down to Singapore to collect my Visa application when it’s done. And since yours truly has never in her life set foot on Singapore. This would be a good chance for me to go shopping! Muahaha..

Ok, what else? I just realised I didn’t blog bout Christmas nor New Year. And so, it’s always better to be late than never! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!! Hahaha… My Christmas was mostly spent in bed cos silly me fell sick on Christmas eve! How great rite?! But anyway, I got this really sweet Christmas present from Dan, a personalised jigsaw of our photos. So yeah, I spent Christmas Eve piecing the pieces together with Dan in my living room. I had the honour to fit the last piece in! Come to think of it, I also have the honour mess up the pieces and to put them together again all by myself when I get to NZ. New Year this time was quiet for me. But it suits me fine. Went to Dan’s church for watch night service and we didn’t manage to have a countdown because this pastor lost track of time and by the time he realised it, it was a lil past 12. But then again, he reasoned that in US, those ppl probably still have to wait for half a day before they get their New Year. So, I guess it’s all relative.

Well, I am slowly absorbing the fact that I am leaving in less than a month. I am so gonna miss the food and basically, whatever that is Malaysian. My flight is confirmed on the 4th Feb but I am also on waiting list on the 5th Feb. So, if I get the one on the 5th, I’ll probable leave on that day. It feels kinda weird cos it was usually me sending off my frens. At the airport, so far was Ping and Sue. And all the other farewells that featured close friends like Reen, Ting, and all the rest. I still remember when Ping was about to leave. I was sad that she was leaving, and I was also sad because everyone knew what they were doing and where they were going, but I was left in Inti, not knowing what future holds for me.

At that time, I couldn’t even see my future in the distant future, the year ahead! And that for me was scary enough. But through those ups and downs and uncertainties in 2004, I can surely say that my hope and future was in God’s hands. I still remember having certain seasons last year, when I am suddenly so fearful of what lies ahead of me. Who likes not knowing what will happen. It’s like walking with a blindfold. A typical analogy it is. But I guess if I walk with a blindfold with Jesus, it’s like I am walking in a wide, boundless field, that I don’t have to be afraid of walking out of the field, into danger.

Looking back, I can now say that the uncertainties were in a way good for me, cos without the struggling and the determination of actually letting go, doing my part, and leaving the rest for God, I wouldn’t have valued this opportunity of studying overseas as much. And I guess, to a certain extent, it’s not where I end up that matters, but it was the process of it. And, being a lil philosophical now, this pretty much applies to our Journey of life. It’s not the final destination (Doctor? Lawyer?An all-famous Career Woman?) that matters, but it is the valuable life experiences that we pick up along the way, that matters most.

ohkayz...this is smth very random cos im supposed to call dan already..

ok, today, collectged my medical report..shd b able to send my Visa application to singapore by next week.

ohya, am doing this on my new laptop!! it's a Toshiba portege. Really small cos it's only 12". so, im just fiddling around. But im yet to load all the programmes to upkeep the laptop. hmm..ok, must go find out how to download AvG, Ad-Aware, and all the other scan programmes. Hmm,.hopefuly dan can help...the only thing nice abt going away is that u get to buy the stuff u need. got a reasonably chunn digi cam. It was really a good bargain!

THere's OCOV (one church one vision) tomorrow at Equitorial Hotel tomorrow. It's gonna quite cool, cos all our 17 congregations of my church frm places like SP, Langkawi and everywhere else are gathering 2gtr! so there shd at least b a thousand or even more ppl! And the Chinese and Tamil and Bahasa congreagations are getting together!

and now, my mum is nagging behind me, complaining why i never wash the toilet. haihz...

ok...v lazy to blog anymore...till some oth time...

dont blame me bout this entry! i told u it's very random!

ehhh@!!!!...is it my comp or what???!!! i logged on to tabulas, and taa dahh...it's this whole new re-vamped site!! and where did my beutiful orange template go to???!! is this happening to everyone?? arrgghhh...so much for spending so much time setting up the template last time. But oh well, I was thinking of changing the backgroud anyway. But still!! ish...

Anyways, a lil from me. Done quite a lot of things over the weekend. Went for committee meeting yesterday,andhad quite a good dinner with pastor and the rest of the committee. Spent the rest of yesterday night with Dan, it's his bday today!! Happie Bday Dan!!! haha..not like he ever visits here..but nvm.,..

Gonna take him for a good dinner tonight. And probably go to the beach. U think tsunami is gonna hit again? wont b so chunn rite?? But that reminds me, I dreamt that I was at a beach with frens. and we were hit by the Tsunami, no body was killed, I think.,.ahahha...but poor me lost her favourite slippers.


Ohya, and Im sooo happy cos there's Internet connection in everyroom in my Dorm!! Dan and I were kinda worried at first cos they said that there would only be University Intranet provided in rooms, which I thought is Internet connection only within campus. Clarified it with Esther, thank God we have very good nBroadband in every room. This piece of news brought me great relief man!...

Ok..I better go get some work done. yes, I still havnt washed the toilet. Ish..dread dread...but stil have to do it. aihz...

Hmm...I realised I've been kinda random nowadays. I guess I am just too lazy to organise anything now.

Adios!

18 January 2005
11.45pm (Tues)

Dan is sick. He had a terrible headache and vomited a lil too. I didn’t realize that I would worry so much about him. Not until just now. Tried to call him so many times just now, but to no avail. Only got through 5 minutes later, when I called his other line. Well, it pains me to hear him sick, and in bed. But oh well, I’m sure God will take good care of him.

Yeah, anyway, mum gave me a long talk just now. Not lecture, but just sound advices before I leave the “nest”. She told me about how I shouldn’t be ashamed or afraid, if in any case I don’t feel comfortable in NZ, and badly need to come home. She also mentioned that I should be assured that I’ll be well received back home, and that home is where I’ll find acceptance and love. Well, I most certainly hope that day won’t arrive. Oh yea, she also advised me to be wise, and not to simply trust people, be careful in spending money, be careful with my laptop, etc etc. I almost thought I was listening to a broken record, but I guess, these are the advices that would bring me a long way in life. As I write, I also remembered that my mum reminded me to be careful in managing my relationship. She just mentioned that I shouldn’t be too engrossed and too “into” it that I neglect my studies. I totally agree with her, and well, I did pull through HSC rite? I guess if this happens, it’ll be a whole set of different distractions! Anyway, I’m really thankful and grateful for my mum, who still cares, and tries to teach me as many things as possible, before I actually leave home. She also mentioned that I’ll definitely be in her prayers, and she told me to treat her like my friend, and continue to tell her about my ups and downs. It seems a lil too early for my mum to tell me these stuff, but according to her, I’m a very busy lady, and said that it’s rather hard for her to find time to talk to me.  This gives me an idea, maybe I should make smth to show her my appreciation. Must as well do it while I still have so much time in my hands these few days.

Yeah, talking about Dan, I sure hope that I will not miss him too much till I cant eat, and sleep, lest concentrate on what I’m doing. At the rate it is now, we can’t seem go by a day without seeing each oth. Well, he’ll usually come find me at my house after meetings at church, or during his lunch time. At present, we can’t help but need to talk to each oth everyday. I guess it’ll be quite a struggle for us, esp at the beginning since we spend so much time together nowadays. The thought of “practicing” did occur to me, but that would mean cutting down the little time that we have left for each oth. Oh God, please help us in this. Lord, this relationship can never work if You’re not in it. I acknowledge Lord, that You first loved us, by sending down Your Son for us, and because of that, we know how to love others. Lord, I place all my trust and hope for this relationship in Your hands. And, Lord, just as everything else is in Your hands, the future of this relationship is also in Your loving hands. Lord, please let this time apart be a time for You to mould us, to make us more like Christ, and that we may be more polished for each other. It’s all in Your hands Lord. It certainly is. And I ask Lord that you’ll grant us the desires of our hearts. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

I’ve been getting along pretty well with Dan’s mum. Have had dinner at his house a few times. Like yesterday, Dan picked me up after work and took me to his house first for dinner, with his mum, his Australian pastor and his wife (who’s staying at his house for the week). And then, all of us went to Komtar’s Dome together for “the Heavenly Man” (this man from China who received great persecution when he was spreading the gospel there). And as I have mentioned before, the world is really a small place! When they dropped me home after the meeting, Dan’s mum said that she knew the guard at my apartments! Apparently it was her colleague last time. And she did get down to talk to him a lil! And to think that the guard already knows Dan well enough cos he visits me quite frequently at night. Haha..a small world indeed.

Urrghh, feeling a lil bloated in the stomach. So, better get some rest. Plus I’ll be going for CF tomorrow, and have to worship lead. Gnitez!

Reen: Currently, my flight is only confirmed on the 4th. But even if I get the flight on 5th, my flight leaves atm 9.30.. So, dunno if you are able to reach Pg in time or not. What time you reaching PG? Much as I really hope I can see you, please don't force it if you really can't.

Ying: Yay!! so you sure you can meet me? yay yay yay! ehhehe..if not, I won't know what to do, being stuck in S'pore for soo long!But, I don't think I'll be able to leave the airport, cos my mum's worried I might be caught in a jam, or for whatever reason, can't get back to the airport in time.

Ok, Janice Cheng, you really need to start exercising! Wahh...my energy is totally sapped after a short game of Hand Ball after CF. And I followed my mum, and took the stairs up to eighth floor instead of using the lift! AIhz..and to think that I'll have much walking up slopes in the not too distant future.

People, please pray for my Visa application to get thru, and be approved. Cos I still havn't heard anything frm them, and I barely have 2 and a half weeks left !!

Speaking about that! aihzz...so sad! now I know why ping didn't want to leave last time! aihz...much as I'm really happy that I get to go somewhere, and my 3 years is more a less charted out, I still dowana leave!!..

Sobb...

Imagine, tomorrow, Dan & I will hit the 8 months mark! time most certainly flies! But these 8 months had been good time for us to learn more about each other more, as well as to grow together in Christ. Well, In many ways, we have helped to build each oth up in our faith, and I sure hope this will continue in the years to come.

Ahh..my back is soo aching..I need a massage! SIs is not in, so , i guess my mum wil have to do it..muahahah..

Currently listening to: Beautiful Soul
Currently reading: The Heavenly Man

Happy burfday gal! If you even read this. eheheh. sorrie lah, me not as comp pro as reen~! But anyways, hope you had a wonderful day today! And well, I wish u all the best in whatever you put your hands to do this year, and in the many many years ahead! Btw, havn't updated much eh?

Oh, yeah, something that I've been pondering on today: How some ppl, in a circle of friendship can infect others more easily than some others. well, not that I've been thinking hard about this, but i guess, I just find myself thinking abt how some ppl find favour with the people around them more than some other ppl. Well, I can only conclude and pacify my wondering mind that all this is due to the different personalities and temperaments of ppl. Ok, I will spare you ppl from the lenghty description of the 4 temperaments (Sanguine Penguin, Choleric Cobra(?), Melancholic(?), Flagmetic flamingo). Plus, I'm not much of a pro at this!

Happy Item for the day:
1. Bukit Tinggi is sooo wonderful! took loads of pictures there. i love it there. SO refreshing, and they beautified the place so much! Love it.

2. Got mics(actually, I already have a built-in one on my laptop, but nvm), web cam(which i bought for RM85 only to realise that another shop sells it for RM80! and we bought 3 web cams k! (dan, home pc, laptop). SO, we could have saved RM15! aiuhz.. blood-suckers! Got a Kingston pen drive for RM105, which was quite good a bargain i think. Bought an ADSL router for home pc, to install streamyx. It was considerably cheap. (but *sobs* streamyx is installed when I go away! wont even get to enjoy the super fast spead! aihzz...)

Sad Item for the day:
cis, after writing a whole list of happy items or the day, i forgot what my sad item is! ish! Im getting old!...argghh.. ummm..umm............Oh My! Short Term Memory Loss! Dorry! ahahha...

well, anyways, forget it lah.

Lesson learnt: remember more happy moments, and all your "sad items for the day" will fade away!

Okie, going off o s'pore in half an hour's time. Ciao!

Just went for squash and badminton at Sarah's house, together with the rest of the cell group. It was quite fun, and Benjamites are certainly an active and sporting bunch! ehheh..But wah lau, my stamina level went down to below zero! And considering that Wellington is situated on the slopes, I'll probably get my training there then! And ohya, one interesting thing I found out, Wellington is situated in the EarthQuake line. THerfore, I'll probably experience temors rather frequently!

Going for US pizza soon, with CG ppl. Their sort of throwing a farewell for me. And it's kinda been like a tradition that all Benjies get a farewell dinner at US Pizza. Yuumm..I can eat a horse nnow! Peperoni.ahah..ok, i'll stop this before I seem like some hungry pig!

Umm, just an update abt what hapened this week. I went to S'pore with mum on Tues-THurs, though most of it was spent on the 9 hour long journey! Well, my butt is most certainly flattened! But we did manage to have a lot of time to shop, till our legs gave way after walking almost the whole day! My Passport endorsement was done without any hassle! thank God for that cos we were expecting to wait for half a day for it to be done! Little did we expect, it was done in less than 5 minutes!! And we were like, "whao!". Yeah, went around Orchard Road, and went shopping a lil! I bought another pair of FILa shoes! It was only S$38 k! I mean,back here, the prices always have 3 digits! SO, it came up to abt 92 bucks, which is oklah, plus it's really comfortable! and got 3 pairs of socks and a pouch, and an umbrella frm there as well.

ANd ohya, called some relatives, and called ying frm the MRT station. But she couldnt meet up with me as I was going to my rellies' house d. SO hopefully can meet her on the 4th when Im transitting there. I find the MRT there so so convenient! ANd it is definitely more chun than Malaysia's LRT. It's smth like London subways (haha..never been to london though!). But i assume it shd be much cleaner in S'pore!

All in all, my FIRST trip to S'pore was quite fun! and well, I wouldnt have to worry so much when I have an 8hour transit at S'pore the next time.

And btw, reen and shiao pei(haha.doubt if she reads this) and whoever else, I dont think I can get the flight on the 5th. SO sadd... Cos I have to confirm the flights 1 week before Im leaving, which is like tomorrow. SO, i guess i'kll have to settle with leaving on the 4th, which is a friday. Which means my mum, Dan ....

ok..my fren's here to pick me d ..ahhah..have to end abruptly here..will continue tonight..